Oddly enough, one of my favorite scenes in any TV show, ever, involves the main character failing to reach his goal. You’d think that might be a bit of a downer, but it’s really a matter of perspective. The scene’s potency – and my appreciation for it – is hugely impacted by my unique progression through life, which I just described in a trilogy of posts titled: Wear It Like Armor, Polarity, and Social Assassin.
What I’m referring to, in particular, is a specific story arc in season 3 of Louie, a TV series by comedian Louis C.K. – so if you’re at all interested in watching the series yourself and avoiding spoilers, I would stop reading here and get on that. Louie is a fantastic series to watch if you’re a fan of Louis C.K.’s comedy – it’s also been widely acclaimed by critics.
The scene in question appears at the very end of a three-episode arc in season 3 – episodes 10, 11, and 12 – Late Show Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3 respectively. Of course, appreciating the scene requires a good grasp of the relevant backstory. In the “Late Show” series, Louie is a 44-year old comedian at a point in his career where he’s used to his routine. He is divorced and has shared custody, so three days a week, his two daughters come to stay with him. His stand-up tour dates allow him to set his own schedule, making all of this possible. But Louie is stagnating a bit, career-wise, and given his age, you can tell there’s some insecurity regarding his future and what he will be doing for work.
Well, one day, Louie goes viral doing a set on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. As a result, he gets called into CBS and told something confidential – that David Letterman is retiring, and that if Louie wanted, he had an opportunity – a shot – at taking Letterman’s place as the host of the Late Show. He’s told that Jerry Seinfeld is the front runner, but that they’re looking for an option, and Louie would cost them a lot less. He is told that if he tries to test for the job and fails, that will probably be it for him, career-wise – he won’t be able to come back from that. But if he succeeds, the network will save a ton of money compared to what Jerry Seinfeld would cost them, the producer would be hailed as genius, Louie would get a stable job plus a large increase in terms of income – basically, everyone would win. So he is asked if he wants to pursue the opportunity and is referred to talk show veteran Jack Dahl, played by none other than David Lynch, who is tasked with helping him get ready for a test screening.
Louie pursues the possibility, but we see him struggle to adapt and doubt himself basically every step of the way. He is concerned about having less time with his kids, and he can very clearly tell that he will have to get out of his comfort zone and worse, alter his identity to succeed at the job – something he absolutely doesn’t want to do – for example, he would have to wear a suit, whereas he always wears simple black shirts when doing comedy. The Dahl character is a key part of this – at his core, he is brutally honest and direct – this increases the pressure Louie feels as he’s being tested and prepared for the hosting gig.
Here’s a scene that illustrates the dynamic:
And along the way, he is warned by his comedian friend Chris Rock not to trust anybody regarding the opportunity. Only to find out later that Chris himself used what Louie told him to get added to the short list for a possible Letterman replacement. It’s not an easy process – while preparing for the gig, Louie not only trains mentally, but spends time getting in shape via running, while also literally getting beaten up in a boxing ring as a side activity, something Dahl set him up to do as part of his preparation. Ostensibly Louie was meant to learn to fight – but it’s clear that what he’s mostly doing is just trying to survive.
Despite every obstacle, Louie perseveres and we get to a scene where Louie is in the green room with his agent Doug, finally at the precipice of walking onto the set for his test filming of Late Show. The audience awaits and you can tell that Louie is understandably nervous – but he’s comforted by a symbolic card with words of support from his two young daughters. Then there’s a knock at the door and Dahl enters, presenting Louie with a tailored suit, and even though Louie was against it the entire time, you can tell how far he’s come by how sincerely he thanks Dahl for the suit. Dahl then proceeds to tell Louie that he’s done his part and that it’s up to him now – and as a parting gesture, he provides him with three “rules of showbusiness”:
Number One: Look ’em in the eye and speak from the heart.
Number Two: You gotta go away to come back.
Number Three: If someone asks you to keep a secret, their secret is a lie.
Dahl leaves, and a few minutes later, Jerry Seinfeld pops in – he informs Louie that he already signed for the job, that it is a done deal, and that he didn’t like the idea of Louie wasting his time doing a test screening without anyone warning him that this had occurred. Louie congratulates him and thanks him for the heads-up. As Jerry leaves, he pauses to ask if Louie would mind doing him a favor and keeping the news secret – as he hasn’t announced it yet. Louie agrees, and when the door closes and they’re alone, he and his agent immediately look at each other and realize that based on Dahl’s third rule of showbusiness, Jerry had to be lying. In that moment, Louie is re-invigorated as he realizes that the only reason Jerry would lie was if he was actually a legitimate threat. There’s no more nervousness – a fire has been lit within Louie – he proceeds to do the test screening and absolutely hits it out of the park.
Following the success of the screening, Louie goes to a bar to celebrate. This is the scene I was referring to – I highly recommend you watch it fully:
Louie’s successful screening was revealed to be nothing more than a ploy by the network to get Letterman to reduce his price to stay on, and worse still, Doug shares that Letterman has taken it personally and has blacklisted Louie from ever appearing on Late Show, where an appearance would be a massive achievement for any comedian – it could make his career. Feeling the weight of all this, Louie leaves the bar and walks up to the Late Show building – but rather than sadly looking onwards as he comes to terms with the idea of his name never appearing on the signage, he smiles, puts his arms up in victory, and says:
“I did it!”
It was a really difficult process for Louie – he was constantly reminded throughout that he wasn’t doing things right, and realized how much he would have to change to even have a shot at achieving his goal. He wasn’t sure what would be next in his life if he didn’t take the shot, and even still, he wondered what it would cost him if he succeeded – namely, in terms of the time spent with his children. He didn’t succeed in getting the job, in the end, but he absolutely succeeded when it came to playing the late night TV game – he managed to become the character that he needed to be to succeed, despite the many challenges he faced along the way. Letterman’s validation meant nothing – the only validation that mattered was internal.
In Wear It Like Armor, I outline how I faced opposition on all fronts growing up – bullies, a difficult home environment – a key aspect of this was my father disliking me more and more as time passed – I could do absolutely nothing right in his eyes. Isolated, with very few friends and that kind of dynamic at home, I had to effectively kill the part of me that cared – my father’s validation meant absolutely nothing. If it did, how could I have continued? By the time I moved out at age 19 and discovered true peace for the first time, I had truly solidified this belief system. People could like me, dislike me, and either way, it was fine – I certainly didn’t need their approval to maintain my peace.
Hence Louie’s next line:
“Hey Letterman, fuck you!”
And then he walks away, knowing full well that he rose to the challenge and succeeded – the only validation that mattered was his own. The music perfectly matches what Louie’s feeling – we see him go back to the gym, and this time, he’s actually learning to box – he’s no longer a target – he’s an active participant leveraging the challenges to grow even further. When I see this scene, I can’t help myself – it brings tears to my eyes – it’s honestly one of the most beautiful endings I have ever seen.